Senin, 07 Juni 2010

hello, future boyfriend

earlier i was got a mental disorder. on everyone, everything, all of the past events for the last few months and stuff. it made me think. why do i want what i want? do i want what i want? should i take a step forward? or should i really be worried about if i need to be taking a step backwards?

i feel like i am just stuck in neutral. i know what i want to do and also what i should or could do. i'm not sure which i need to be doing though. which one will be more beneficial. will they be equally beneficial? or will neither path pay off? what are my motives? i would really like to answer these questions. however, i'm not sure that i can. i'm not kind of that " possitive ". this is a very interesting part of my life and i am eager to see how it will play out.

until then, i think that in order to be able to answer these questions, i will need to regroup, reorganize, and re-prioritize. i have been a little bit irresponsible lately and i would really like to put more effort into important things, like putting things in priorities. i should slow down and think about everything. i should slow down and enjoy simple things. i should probably also slow down and think about what i say, what i do, and how i spend my time. from now on, i am going to try to make a conscious effort to focus more on what is important and less on what is not and maybe trying to be more serious.

if you read all of that, then you got a big smooch from me.

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